The Ache

The devastation that comes with a relationship split is extraordinary.
The pain can be like that that comes with the death of a loved one or the news of a terrible illness.
It is life changing.
Whether it is the demise of a long term love or the sudden end to a passionate new encounter that had so much hope and yearning to it, the finality can be like that of taking a bullet to the sternum.

In fact, sometimes it is the end of the newer relationship that stings the most!
Because it was still so heated and raw and vulnerable, the new relationship break-up can be the more painful and confusing.

Patterns are harder to identify and potential problems overlooked because of the initial passion.
You just don't see it coming.

Even a relationship that has seemed sturdy can start to unravel...

Any change or pressure in the normal day to day comings and goings of a relationship can tip the scales to a crisis. There isn’t automatically a third party and if there is, it may not be a sexual thing. Even a same-sex friend can upset the balance in a seemed to be healthy relationship. Financial crisis can be another trigger, illness, pregnancy or a move to a new location.
People grow and change throughout their lives and it’s tricky to do it at the same rate as your partner.
There is no sure fire guard against this happening but the best way to weather change is with communication and to be sure and confidant in yourself.
Our own self esteem is key to our own happiness. If we work on ourselves and getting what we want out of life, we are staying in charge of our own destiny.
We should never have to sacrifice who we are for a relationship.
Don’t settle for less than what you’re worth just to have one.